story time!

I know this guy from my Childhood, we Used to play together and we became friends.i know him about 8 years he was very funny guy and we always Been together everywhere.we are family friends in a large group
That going everywhere together for outing, party ... These kinda stuff.
Everybody in our group and me Knew That
him always stick together and for hire could always find us together.it was great When we were best friends, we always Used to sit next to each other laughing, joking and make fun of everything, we always had great time together only sometimes argue for little That would Solve Quickly things.

Times Passed and i limit Runway feelings for him i Knew he also rates limit the SAME feelings behavior.but Because of his weird it was kinda hard for me to accept it Because I'm 19 and he is Younger than me, and i was asking my self why would i have feelings for him Runway! he's Younger than me and i ashamed
to show my feelings Because of my pride and i always pretended That there's nothing more than a friendship between us.

But also rates it was hard for me when he was talking with me about his girlfriend he broke up with Selatan, only after it short relationship.

I remember it was a party at Their villa and we were all there together (family friends group), Having fun like always.at the end of the night i do not know what Came up to me That I asked him:
is there anything you ever wanted to tell me but you could not?

He looked in my eyes with smile on his face and said: yes but what about you? I said: yes but i asked you first Then Should answer first .... so and on and on.everybody were Leaving and my family were waiting for me so we said goodbye and we could not say anything about That to each other.

When i got home i received text from him, he said: if I'm thinking about what you thinking, it's true i feel the SAME also rates ...
and we decided to talk about it tomorrow, where we were to meet with group Toss in a fast food for dinner.

We sat next to each other and eating our dinner, talking, laughing just normal like always, Then we found a place there to be alone and talk ... Then i did not know till he's shy at this point! It was hard for him to tell his feelings.after a few minutes Trying to say Something about That, he said he Wants me to be his girlfriend
and he said it was about years That he limits Runway feelings for me and he was afraid to tell me Because he thought i refuse.
so we started talking about situation and the relationship That we started.i was happy and a bit nervous That moment, i never feeling The annual limit for Any guy before, i MIGHT liked guys but not missing much as i liked him.

Months Passed and we were happy together we never limit bad conversation and hardly Ada argue.we were kinda Worry for our relationship Lingo Because sometimes we felt like we are still like the old friends we Used to be.sometimes i did not even feel That he's my boyfriend him.but how ever i loved it he said we'll make different.he always said he loves me and i could only say the SAME FEW times not always Because of my pride it was not easy for me to say That . in my words but it was easy for him to understand That I love him.
so as everyone describes love, i was in love with him.

Our relationship did not changed and i decided to speak with him about it so That we could find a way to Solve this.
BEFORE A few days ago it was a new year party and we all were family friends Having fun together like always ...
i Told him That I wanna speak with him so we went for walking, i was nervous and did not know where to start.so i said our relationship has not changed and i do not feel That you are my boyfriend we better try to make our relationship feel stronger.he said he agreed with the SAME and me.some how i wanted to break up with him but i loved him and i thought if i Give him time he'll make it alright.so i did do that but inside i felt this relationship is wrong, but i could not help my feelings.i Told him even if he Wants to break up with me Then say it to me not to stay with me on pressure.

It was the third day of new year That he Called me and said: our relationship has not changed we're still like past .... That was the time That I felt he Wants to break up with me but he did not know how to say to not hurt me.so i said: i get it You Want to finish this? he said: NO NO, i love you and i want to be with you, let's be Separate for A few days and see how hard it would be for us to not be together and it MIGHT help to make our relationship Stronger.
Then i accepted his decision and said: it's ok with me if u think this is the better way let's do it and tell me when ever you thought it's enough to be Separate ;)

Of Tomorrow That day he texted me and said: that's enough (just for joking) and continued: are you agree with me That our worlds are very Runway? I just said yes.
he texted again: our relationship is like our friendship, nothing's changed and i do not think ever change.do That You Want to finish this????

That was the moment That I felt TechPowerUp stab a dagger in my heart, it was like all Those happy memories lost crushed.i felt boots Because of my pride i said: if it is what you Want i have nothing to say, i won ' t force you to stay with me.but with That you showed me That you never loved me.
he said: i suggested you Because I loved you, i really did not mean to hurt you, I'm really sorry and i do not want this to ruin our friendship.
i could not Believe That he said so i said: your love was not enough Otherwise you would try to make our relationship Stronger Runway and not to runaway with finishing it and i do not think i cans be with you like this past soon .
he also rates Admitted That he felt like a jerk and felt he played my feelings, he was sorry but it was not enough for me Because my heart was broken </ 3
Called me and he tried to talk to me and Cheer me up or Explaining but i rejected him.

Now it's about 2 months also rates That we see each other in the group at Parties but we do not even say hi, i do not wanna see his face again Because it Makes me feel bad and reminds me of what he did to me.my friends says he'll come back but i Doubt it and if he even Come back i will not have the SAME feelings for him That I limit.

All i cans say now is That love was wrong, i do not know he really loved me or not but i feel regret that i accepted That relationship Because it ruined our friendship Selatan will not coming back ... When we Used to sit next to each other, everywhere together, laughing, joking, making fun of everything ... sometimes i miss that.now it's what i can not get it back .... and i only hope That things would be better: (

Dalam hati ada taman .

                  
             he's my friend. he belongs to me. :p

aku sudah bebas dari SPM !

haiiiii. sekian lama tak update blog aku ni, dah berhabuk rupanya. by the way nak bagi tahu korg yang aku dah bebas dari penjara smk taman tunku! aku dah bebas!. haha. slama ni aku macam banduan jak. cikgu-cikgu tak spotting lerr. kat skolah td, bila last paper. xsabar nak siapkan . macam biasa. .  main hantam saja laa jawapan . . lepas ni rindu dengan kawan2. pandai2 la korg rindu sama aku nanti. siap korg.heyyy, baju skolah ni akan aku simpan sampai lipas yang makan . buku-buku macam mana pulak? jual saja laaa . kurang2 pun dapat 20sen jadi la pakai beli ice-cream . kasut pulak???? nak bagi dengan sapa? bagi sama mama saja la, pakai dia berkebun, kesian mama slalu kaki ayam berkebun, apa salahnya sedekahkan kasut skolah sama mama. stokin? bagi cicak kt rmh aku ni jak laa, mereka memerlukan stokin sebagai selimut. beg pula???bagi tong sampah saja laa, apa susah. hahaha. ayoo. lupa peluk kawan-kawan tadi. ni tepung punya pasal laaa, bagi aku lari balik rumah cepat. ishhh. bye 5 BESTARI CLASS, we are never ever  back together! :(